i still feel it all.

How in the fuck did I manage to lose
Every person I spent all my time with
Tryna create a connection that's stronger
Than time and that could be considered as timeless
It hurts even more cause I'm still tryna
Figure out where in the hell it went wrong
I don't wanna talk about how much it
Hurts to a person so I take it out on a song

I take it out on myself
I take it out on my physical and mental health
I fucking hate what I felt
I'm getting worse and I don't even think you can tell
I make myself wanna quit
Filling my mind with a person I need to forget
Honestly I'm fucking pissed
I can't see the future but I never thought it'd be this

I don't really wanna try meeting new friends
I don't wanna waste my time on something that'll end
What the fuck is happy? I can only pretend
Leaving it to God in itself is a sin
You're the only person with the power in your life
That can change for the better with the state that you're in
You're the only person that can give your life a purpose on this earth
And make it all worth it again

I don't wanna feel this pain
I don't wanna play this game
I don't wanna keep writing songs that're sad
I just want my life to change
I just don't wanna let life slip away, and die with a void of regret
I don't wanna keep waking up and not
Get out of bed because I'm too upset