12 Uncle Bernie s Farm

I'm dreaming . . . (Oh no-o-o!)

There's a bomb to blow your mommy up
A bomb for your daddy too (Ouch)
A baby doll that burps & pees
A case of airplane glue
A hungry plastic troll
To scarf your buddy's arm
A box of ugly plastic things marked:
Uncle Bernie's Farm!

There's a little plastic congress
There's a nation you can buy
(I'll take two)
There's a doll that looks like mommy
She'll do anything but cry
(I seen her)
There's a doll that looks like daddy
He's a funny little man
Push a button & ask for money
There's a dollar in his hand
(Check his wallet)

We gotta send Santa Claus back
to the Rescue Mission
Christmas don't make it no more
Don't you know that murder & destruction
Scream the toys in every store
(Think this'll sell in New York?)
There's a man who runs the country
There's a man who tried to think
And they're all made out of plastic
When they melt they start to stink
There's a book with smiling children
Nearly dead with Christmas joy!
And smiling in his office
Is the creep who makes the toys . .

FZ: We got this car: when it hits the wall you see the guy dying . . .
you got the little plastic puddles of blood that you put up on the car
(I'M DREAMING . .)
Ray: And his intestines . . . you have plastic intestines
you can stuff back into his stomach . .
FZ: There's this other thing, I've got bombs.
I've got rockets, I've got a . . .
I've got a stilson wrench & plastic brass knuckles . .
Ray: And it comes with a tape recorder with sound effects . . .
screaming and crying
FZ: We got a '39 Chevy . .